Hello! My name is Heidi Good Swiacki. I have been married to Steve for 25 years, which has been filled with laughter, trust and love. We have 2 great kids, Ashton 22 and Chris 16. I have ALS, aka Lou Gehrigs Disease. I was officially diagnosed March '05, I was just turning 45. This blog will be about a myriad of topics. I will share my ALS story which will hopefully encourage others. It will show that quality of life comes in many forms. I have to tell you up front that there will be some spiritual references. Don't be afraid or turned off by that. Since I have had ALS I have seen many miracles. Let's be realistic, who can be a happy, non-verbal,ventilated quadriplegic without Faith? I hope you will join me and make this an interesting, educational, inspirational forum. Humor and the ability to enjoy life is required! :)

Heidi passed away 3-25-13 :(

August 4, 2013

Hello, Steve here. To help with the healing process, I am going to continue on with Heidi's blog, primarily talking about our lives and how we as a family are learning to live on with Heidi's memories pushing us forward. Topics covered will be geared towards the affects ALS has on loved ones.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Family and Your Terminal illness

Over the years, I have had a number of friends pass away, some quickly and some slowly. In each case I found that no matter what the spouse did, it was never good enough to my friends parents. I heard complaints that they were incapable of caring for them, they were slobs, they did not love them. The list goes on and none are really that flattering. The thing is, a parent should never have to watch their baby suffer, they should not have to watch a slow death. So judgement and feelings towards the spouse can be skewed and clouded due their grief of not being able to stop the pain or cure the incurable disease.

It seems that they only see the negative impact watching your loved one die can have on you. They see your bouts of depression as a weakness, that you don't love your wife. They don't see that you too are having a very hard time adjusting to watching the love of your life die a slow death.

My message to anyone who is faced with the horrible reality of  living with a terminal disease is this. Sit down and have a frank discussion with your spouse and any in-law that is considering moving in to "help". If there is any hidden animosity or distrust it can  be magnified 10 fold by their grief and what started out as a great thing can turn into something that could lead to some very difficult decisions.

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