A few weeks ago one of my dearest friends email'd with questions about God's selection process. Why do so many evil and unhappy people live? While so many young, contributing, happy and faithful people die? As she said, "it's so random ". It can rock your faith when some are taken from this world and others are left behind.I really didn't know what to say and have been wrestling with it ever since she wrote me. The one thing I didn't want to do was give her a neatly packaged Christian saying. My response would be it's God's plan and even though we don't understand it our faith helps us accept it. This is pretty close to a canned Christian response, even though I believe it with all my heart, to others it may sound like "Christian-Speak".Before I share this devotional with you I would like to share a moment with you. Sherry Hahn-Hicks, a Godly woman about my age and a friend. She was walking with her son and new daughter-in -law in San Francisco. They were hit by a repeat drunk driver. The daughter is still in ICU, the son is well but Sherry is with the Lord. One redeeming factor is the drunk driver was arrested on the spot for vehicular homicide. Please pray for their family and peace.
I received this devotional on 9/13 that talks directly to the issue of what do you say when something terrible happens.This is for you Bonnie.
Lysa TerKeurst
September 13, 2012
Please Don't Give Me a Christian Answer
Lysa TerKeurst
"The right word at the right time is like golden apples in silver jewelry." Proverbs 25:11 (NIRV)
I love Jesus. I love God. I love His Truth. I love people.
But I don't love packaged Christian answers. Those that tie everything up in a nice neat bow. And make life a little too tidy.
Because there just isn't anything tidy about some things that happen in our broken world. The shooting that recently happened in Aurora, Colorado, is awful and sad and so incredibly evil.
And God help me if I think I'm going to make things better by thinking up a clever Christian saying to add to all the dialogue. God certainly doesn't need people like me — with limited perspectives, limited understanding, and limited depth — trying to make sense of things that don't make sense.
Is there a place for God's truth in all this? Absolutely. But we must, must, must let God direct us. In His time. In His way. In His love.
And when things are awful we should just say, "This is awful." When things don't make sense, we can't shy away from just saying, "This doesn't make sense." Because there is a difference between a wrong word at the wrong time, and a right word at the right time.
When my sister died a horribly tragic death, it was because a doctor prescribed some medication that no child should ever be given. And it set off a chain of events that eventually found my family standing over a pink rose draped casket.
Weeping.
Hurting.
Needing time to wrestle with grief and anger and loss.
And it infuriated my raw soul when people tried to sweep up the shattered pieces of our life by saying things like, "Well, God just needed another angel in heaven." It took the shards of my grief and twisted them even more deeply into my already broken heart.
I understand why they said things like this. Because they wanted to say something. To make it better. Their compassion compelled them to come close.
And I wanted them there. And then I didn't.
Everything was a contradiction. I could be crying hysterically one minute and laughing the next. And then feel so awful for daring to laugh that I wanted to cuss. And then sing a praise song. I wanted to shake my fist at God and then read His Scriptures for hours.
There's just nothing tidy about all that.
You want to know the best thing someone said to me in the middle of my grief?
I was standing in the midst of all the tears falling down on black dresses and black suits on that grey funeral day. My heels were sinking into the grass. I was staring down at an ant pile. The ants were running like mad around a footprint that had squashed their home.
I was wondering if I stood in that pile and let them sting me a million times if maybe that pain would distract me from my soul pain. At least I knew how to soothe physical pain.
Suddenly, this little pigtailed girl skipped by me and exclaimed, "I hate ants."
And that was hands-down the best thing anyone said that day.
Because she just entered in right where I was. Noticed where I was focused in that moment and just said something basic. Normal. Obvious.
Yes, there is a place for a solid Christian answer. Absolutely.
But there's also a place to just weep with no answers at all.
God help us to know the difference.
Dear Lord, thank You for being there in my darkest time. I know You are real and You are the only one who can bring comfort to seemingly impossible situations. Please help me speak Your truth to those around me. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Reflect and Respond:
Think of someone in your life who is going through a really tough situation. How can you make a difference in their life today?
Instead of words of encouragement, it may involve serving them and making sure their physical needs are met during this difficult time. Allow God to lead you as you try to serve your friend best.
Power Verses:
Romans 12:15-16, "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another." (NIV)
Ecclesiastes 10:12, "The words of a wise person are gracious. The talk of a fool self-destructs." (MSG)
© 2012 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
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Matthews, NC 28105
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